Friday, at The Burren, two college kids were having a soft-core porn mug down that lasted well over 10 minutes. Now in the back room at The Burren it is normal to see bandits in their natural habitat, cheap beers, cheesy cover-band and really dark and crowded. The kicker was their dedication to each other, there were dollars being thrown at them, at least 50 photos where a friend jumped in the shot, and a shout out from the band once they resumed their set. Also found a new drunk Chinese food place for when the bar closes, Kee Kar Lau.
Saturday brunch at Soundbites then it is off to the pub crawl at 2.
- Bar 1 Bell and Hand - Donate to Lupus and get dirty name tag (I need 2 Guys) - check
- Teach Hurricane what "hot dog down a hallway means" (it took two analogies and hand motion but she caught on)- Check
- Bar 2 Patty O's at capacity skip
- Bar 3 Hennessy's. See Miller light girls and switch to Miller Light for free shit. Yep very buzzed at 4pm.
- Gear collected was eye black, winter hats, koozies and QB arm bands that we wrote our own plays on. Including "Do not send to jail. Return to Somerville. Reward: Hand Jobs"
- Best Quote before 5pm- "If I had to get fisted, I would want it to be by a midget... think about it" well clearly you have. The dirty name tags are really a great conversation starter.
- 5PM head to the Boston College Tailgate w/ Hurricane, AT stays on the crawl (6 beers down)
At tailgate see all sorts of old friends, luckily most of my friends are early drinkers so it wasn't too obvious, I was on a pub crawl other than the Miller Light gear. Did a power hour in the rain, had jello shots and was too drunk to hit on anyone successfully. I am a very easily distracted drunk. Then the Steves found me...
I have bad luck with Steve's and need to quit them.
- Walking into the game I get a text from Big Steve, who I haven't heard from since I won a bet with, pay up ass
- During the game I find that Unicorn Steve (he was amazing) is looking for me at a bar. Our last two meetings were not good. Once he ran off a guy I was with. Then before that the other he was mad b/c I would hook up with him. YOU LIVE WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND OF 4 YEARS! WE HAVEN'T BEEN TOGETHER IN 5. Stop tempting me. I decided not to go, because I would have said yes.
- Then I met another Steve on the way into the game, while stuffing beers and nips down my pants for the game. He was entered in my phone as "Steve Again." Hurricane said at one point during the game he tried to hold my hand and I looked at him and said "This is weird and dropped his hand." Peace out Steve
While Hurricane and I are flirting with each other and a blackout AT is taking the crown of TRIPLE BANDIT. Between the hours of 5 pm and 1am my crown was stolen, by someone who had Miller Light koozie on one hand and a beer in the other! BC wins over ND 17-0.
